#5321   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<GunnX> I was locked in my bathroom once getting ready for a date <GunnX> :) <GunnX> door knob fell off <GunnX> those were the days <polyglot> wtf were you doing to the doorknob?

#5322   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

BeHeMoTh101 : i'm waiting for the right girl..... the kind that will have sex with me

#5323   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<nihil-_> she's about as darling as waking up in the morning with another mans semen all over my face

#5324   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<fireside> cum is teh nasty <died_in_sleep> and you know this how? <fireside> ive (accidently) and unfortuntly licked some <died_in_sleep> you shouldt know those things, unless your dad rapes you :/ <fireside> i can cum bitch <dragondyne> how is that possible? <fireside> um <fireside> it comes out... on finger... i put finger in mouth, it taste bad <dragondyne> ... <dragondyne> I thought you said "accidently" <fireside> I WAS HORNY GIVE ME A DAMN BREAK :(

#5325   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

* eMeow-v2 fiddles with his r00t <Apollo-> Can you fiddle with my r00t too? I like it when people play with my root <eMeow-v2> Apollo-: you want "girlfriend". STFW. <Apollo-> haha <Apollo-> No, if I had a "girlfriend", "wife" would STFW for "unsolvable murder"

#5326   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

Dainichi> Sometimes, I really do think it'd be nifty-keen to have another me around. Phantbert> no way Phantbert> I'd hate to have another me Phantbert> the last thing I need is another pretentious asshole to deal with.

#5327   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

Phantbert> I work at a pizza place Phantbert> and the smallest size pizza is called a 6-inch Phantbert> so yesterday Phantbert> I actually uttered the phrase Phantbert> "I have a six inch sausage."

#5328   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<McMoo> i need to start making a list of crap i need to buy for my new place <timmo> 1) food <var-> 3 gallons vaseline, subscriptoin to hustler, 100 cases of ramen <timmo> hah <kisama> heh <kisama> vaseline isn't even that great <kisama> fuck that pussy shit <kisama> you need astroglide <kisama> and a set of japanese wack mittens <kisama> let me link you <kisama> http://www.jlist.com/cgi-bin/disp.cgi?img=http://images.jlist.com/c2/jr6992.jpg&x=573&y=500 <kisama> One of the tools used by soap girls is a rubber "magical mitten" which works with soap as lubricant for a great feel. This is a super soft rubber sheet that is held in the hand and used to clean anything you might want to clean. <var-> haha <timmo> you scare me snow <kisama> just trying to ensure a soapland experience in the privacy of your own home.

#5329   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

HyperKinetic> Crap, I got olive jizz on my shirt Bug> ... Lyme> o_O HyperKinetic> It's coooold! Bug> Why were you jerking off an olive? HyperKinetic> LOL, no Bug> Little Hyper has some strange tastes. HyperKinetic> ARGH Lyme> Olivefucker Bug> He's after the pimento.

#5330   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

ElectromagneticPhantom> there's like this monster, stooping over a dead body, it looks up at the camera, and as it moves, the heavy skin shifts and folds over itself in places and IT LOOKS FRELLING *REAL* Lyme> Okay, PHant, I read that sentence, and thought you were talking about dick. ElectromagneticPhantom> yeah Lyme> I reread it like, 3 times, and I still think you're talking about dick. Lyme> Are you talking about dick? ElectromagneticPhantom> but this monster has no eyes, I think. and four legs ElectromagneticPhantom> and claws and stuf Lyme> Four-legged dickmonster ElectromagneticPhantom> and nasty teeth ElectromagneticPhantom> and it eats people CommandantCleavage> four-legged dick monster? You mean men? Lyme> four-legged clawed cannibalistic dickmonster ElectromagneticPhantom> it is NOT a dickmonster! Lyme> It only eats other dick. ElectromagneticPhantom> STOP IIIIIIIT

#5331   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

PhantomStark> <-- laughing too hard to express it in internet acronyms

#5332   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

* EndersShadow remembers erector sets, you had to buy several before you had enough parts to have a big erection

#5333   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

Dainichi> I'm going to start a band called Hand Solo. Dainichi> Our first song will be a heavy metal cover of "I Touch Myself"

#5334   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

[Red-Fraggle] I just noticed sumthin'... Those Star Trek uniforms can't hide a stiffy.

#5335   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

BoobiePatutti> My mom is now telling me what Hobbits do with their feet at night. BoobiePatutti> Feeting. BoobiePatutti> Like fisting, only with their feet.

#5336   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

Bug> (That really happened to a friend of mine. Her pitbull used her friend's dildo as a rawhide bone..)

#5337   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

[Lyme] My granpa is seriously nuts. When my parents went to visit him for his 60th anniversary thingie, he wore 1 dangly woman's earing and a gilligan hat.

#5338   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

[Dainichi] I want a penis! Hell, you have a penis, you can masturbate anywhere! [Dainichi] For a woman to do it RIGHT, she has to lay down. Man gets a boner in the kitchen, he can wack off in the kitchen. [Dainichi] If I had a penis...I'd lock myself in my room for so long that my friends and family would probably end up calling missing persons on me.

#5339   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

[HyperKinetic] They ate each other, they moaned. They were zombies

#5340   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

Bug> Red, yer a nut. Bug> A left nut. justRed-dammit> oooo.. will you be the right nut so that i can rub against you in tight clothing?

#5341   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

justRed-dammit> i wish i had the ability to go back in time and make sure that what was to become of brittney spears ran down her daddy's leg!

#5342   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<Paveourroads> in a multiplayer game, you can be all, "Look, I have cooler shit than you." in a singleplayer game, you're like, "OK, my stuff is cool." and you show people who come over to your house and they're like, "You're a loser." so you cry and die. >:(

#5343   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<Numloxx> why is it that when i saw the book troubleshooting winXP, i immediately had a vision of somebody with a sniper rifle trying to shoot through the whole in the middle of a winXP cd... <Nick> because you're an idiot <sion> Or special <sion> "special"

#5344   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<malcolm> c pointers work just like laser pointers

#5345   + 0 -   X   C   17/01/26 21:08

<malcolm> I would appreciate it more if I didn't have to set JAVA_HOME and ANT_HOME and HILL_DEPTH and AVERAGE_LIFESPAN_OF_INSECT and NUMBER_OF_LEGS and DIRECTION_OF_PREVAILING_WIND and BIRTHDAY